She has been a nice breath of fresh air, this sweet baby girl of ours. A lighthouse in a dark, vast ocean trying to swallow me during a treacherous storm; giving me focus, hope, and a light to steady and remind me that I can make it another day at seas. In ten years she will hate my guts but until then, I will hold on to the life preserver she’s thrown. Exhaustion and happiness.
Her sweet coos and easy smiles melt my heart and reenergize my soul. Even at 2am when I have to drag myself out of bed to respond to gentle cries of hunger and sobs of loneliness.
The perfect juxtaposition of crazy and calm, my children they are. Our days are filled with chaos and noise. Talking over one another with expanding vocabularies and make believe stories. Sticky hands and floors. Tiny legos and half eaten granola bars littered on the floor. Shrieks of laughter followed by cries for “mama.” The watchful eyes of baby sister following sounds and faces and learning about our family.
She is a constant reminder of how fast time is flying. As if it’s grown wings and taken us on the ride of our lives. We’ve so quickly gone from baby swings and boppy pillows to bike riding and t-ball mitts. And soon, braids and baby dolls. I breathe in this baby’s awesome, sweet new smell. And ruffle the thick blonde hair of those confident and energetic little boys as they hug me with all of their might.
It’s taken me a little while to get here. Each baby teaches me more about myself. That I am strong. Fearless. Beautiful. Able. Loving. Creative. Wonderful. It’s hard to believe, most days. But I see it in their eyes. And it gives me the breath I need to keep going.
I am grateful to you, my beautiful babies, for choosing me as your mother. You have been the most wonderful gifts I could ever receive in a lifetime. Happy Mother’s Day.